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Now I don’t want any of you to panic. I’m here to provide a character reference for my old master Mitt Romney who I hear through a clairvoyant taxidermist in Des Moines has purchased Plasma Resources UK, which provides blood supplies to the UK’s National Health Service. Of course, this lady is not always reliable. It was only a little while ago that she told me UK ex-Prime Minister Tony Blair had become a Middle-East peace envoy which was clearly a by-product of her methamphetamine habit. But she had three crystal balls up and a handful of tarot cards so I guess this time she may not be fooling. Just so you know, there was no foul play and no Mormon ex-Governors of Massachusetts were involved, but I am, ever so slightly, dead. This makes my opinion just as valid as any US senator or semi-recumbent member of the UK House of Lords. More so in fact as I no longer have a drooling problem.

Mr Romney, through his private equity firm Bain Capital can be relied upon to show the same judgement he displayed when he strapped me to the roof of his car for a 12 hour, 650 mile trip to Ontario.  That is all.